May it last until it lasts
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May it last until it lasts

Til death do us part? Not necessarily. I believe that is old school, the classic matrimony – which I admire a lot, but which it isn´t as strong as it used to be. I wonder why that is and I answer my own question with another answer: when you find someone you think is ideal for you, do you find that person for life or only for a moment in time?

The ones who are older than, say, 30, certainly remember that up to some years ago when you went on a date you would either wait for that person to call or you would be hoping to meet again by chance somewhere (if the date were good, of course). Nowadays things are changed, though – the Internet has transformed it all and it has become too easy to reach people all the time.

Is that good? It depends on how you see it, I guess. The same way social networks bring people closer, they certainly make relationships more vulnerable and disposable. This is exactly why couples from the past would last longer. We could say that love was less tempting.

And that is why I ask again: would there be a perfect one for you in a six-billion people world? I believe there may be and there may not be. We all want someone to spend our lives with. People in general look for a companionship with whom it is possible to feel more complete, someone who adds, someone to share the moments with, who makes us laugh. People want someone who makes their heart skip a beat.

I am not talking about feelings here, because that is too personal and intimate of each person. What I am talking about are the characteristics which approximate people, as the ones below:

Intensity: stop the love play. Live the second date as if it were the first – or the last! That is not being silly, it is being complete and intense. If it is to be, let it be strong and happy.

Partnership: understand that being someone´s partner does not mean being the person´s boss. No one owns anyone in this world. Free the person you like, as they say around there... ´if you love them, set them free.´

Jealousy: know how to show it in moderation. Of course you will not let your partner free as if you would accept her to do anything she would like to do – even things you certainly wouldn´t like! Feeling jealous is perfectly common, as long as it isn´t something over-the-top.

Fidelity: saying the truth is essential. If you lie to someone, you lie to yourself. Do not think cheating is good for you, this is something which happens to those who are not capable of spicing things up at home.

Individuality: respect it so you build a healthy relationship with your partner. Each of you deserve to have your own routine, your own moments and friends. If you call all the time or are always worried about what she´s doing, stop. Go play poker with your friends, let her go out with hers. Both of you need a breath of fresh air and appreciating the differences between you is learning with each other.

Moderation: I am talking about alcoholic beverages here. It is nice to see a couple who drink together and have fun together. Control yourself, though. There is a limit between doing something fun and acting totally crazy.

I bet we all like when someone tells us they like us. Being rational is interesting and vital when it comes to a relationship, but affection is also something we need to work on if we want a person to know how we feel. Pay some compliments, let her know she is important to you. Say it!

Serenity: of course we all need to have some attitude, but it is also great if we don´t hold back. Learn how to see life without sorrow or regret. Laugh of the silly things you have done, learn from your mistakes and let bad feelings behind.

Ambition: go for what you believe. It is sad to live with a person who doesn´t do anything to change and who is happy with little. Think outside the box, believe in yourself and in your goals.

Originality: you don´t want someone beside you who is the same as everyone else. You want someone who completes you and who surprises you. Beauty isn´t everything. People gotta have their own way of seeing life, their own style and even their own flaws.

understand it as a way of relating to the world. Elegance goes from the way you walk up to much further than that – it is knowing how to express yourself, especially when it comes to attitudes and words. Elegance is a combination between harmony and sense of humor.

Inteligence: living with someone with whom you can discuss ideas and share knowledge makes any relation stronger, more positive and amazing.

impressing is awesome! Care about the other and make that person happy.

I could keep talking and talking, but all these have to do with one thing only: living the moment. What is good for you today may not cause the same feelings on you tomorrow. It is part of growing up, people change, your preferences change. So you and the person who is sharing your life with you should be in sync. If this person has all of the above, be sure you are a lucky guy, thank her and love her deeply. If not, live that moment while it lasts, while it makes you happy, and then set it free.

Gustavo Sana

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