Reflections
credits: Pixabay

Reflections

During the day we are slaves of one another, of all the humanity that demands from us, thinking, answering, participating, from the most intimate to the acquaintances, and of all the strangers who go by driving, running or who simply cross our reality on the streets of the world.

We are slaves of cellphones, computers, messages, meetings, appointments, always late even without knowing or noticing that hours go by, to make us older and cruelly show the inutility of rushing by.

“Slowly but surely”, people say, but in modern times hurrying is part of the perfection demanded by life.

“I do nothing from life, I simply exist”, Fernando Pessoa used to say, but who accepts this simple truth nowadays?

Fernando Pessoa also used to say “I am nothing. Never shall be anything. Cannot will to be anything. This apart, I have in me all the dreams of the world.”

It is different at night, we are slaves of stars, dreams, realities we still haven’t lived and maybe never will, and of nightmares, that invade us without warning, reminding us of everything we’ve been through and suffered.

We search for our partners in bed and, with or without them, we feel lonely, the loneliness of not being the genius within us, the imaginary genius that makes us heroes of our own dreams.

We wake up late at night, we grope to the dark bathroom, ignoring the mirrors. Waking up is not pretty, it’s good, it’s awesome, practical. It’s knowing that we are alive despite the eves, and that the past is sinking in dreams, and that it’s daylight already and everything is restarting, the invisible slavery is putting pressure on us and we’re repeating the same as usual.

But for all of us there’s coming a day in which hope becomes reality, and even in the slavery of the hours, of sleepless nights and of anxious dawns, we’re going to be real heroes simply because we found love.

And by adding loves we start loosing grudges, because even when we don’t notice we become owners of our hearts.

And then we can re-write Fernando Pessoa’s poem and say:
I’m everything
I’ll always be everything
It cannot be different
Because I love and I am loved, what’s better, way better than all dreams in the world.

(please forgive me, master Fernando Pessoa, for playing with your words).

 

Max Gonçalves



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